Untitled Ninety-eight

Didn’t mean to– and no this isn’t a sorry. I wasn’t trying to come off like

that, rude. I–It’s just, connecting is really hard, especially when you feel

alone. I didn’t stop trying though, maybe not hard enough. See, I use to think I

was afraid of connecting to people, now I’m just scared of them leaving. Why

wasn’t the connection strong enough to stay?

— Day Sibley

Para mamá

Why do you mess everything up?!

The welts from your belt turned into authorial fist

I wanted you dead for a long time now. Perhaps I

still do.

 

I should have aborted you!

You thought I took something from you the moment

I grew into your womb. Maybe you should have, as I

don’t see the point in living if I want to be dead.

 

Leave then, I don’t care where you go!

I don’t know everything in the world, but if

I can survive the Hell you gave me, walking on

eggshells in my own home perhaps what the world will do is nothing.

 

I love you baby.

You’re the reason why I second guess those

words anytime it flies out of someone’s mouth.